Not All Damsels Are In Distress
by Lady-Nuriko
Summary: Lord Hotohori and Sir Tamahome set out to rescue Princess Nuriko who was kidnapped by the Evil Nakago. I apologize for my lack of updating! Here it is at last, chapter 2 !
1. The Beginning

Lord Hotohori rode down the generic dusty path with the forest scenery around it. He was mounted atop his most trusted steed, making him look more dignified and important (The handsome part is a standard trait for any bishounen in a shojo series.). He glanced back behind him at his companion as well as good friend Sir Tamahome, the not-so-bishie when compared to Lord Hotohori. He rode some distance behind him, on a horse that looked like it was just about ready for the glue factory. All of their belongings and supplies, as well as Lord Hotohori's hair products (for the bishounen shine) were all packed onto the worn horse as well as piled in Sir Tamahome's arms, making it a challenge for him to see anything, much less where they were going.  
  
"Uh... tell me again Lord... why am I carrying all of our bags?" Sir Tamahome spoke sounding somewhat annoyed when he caught a glance of his friends' horse completely bare.  
  
Lord Hotohori blinked in confusion. "You wouldn't want me, your Lord to hurt himself by carrying so many un-necessary... trinkets would you?"  
  
"May I remind you that most of these are YOUR trinkets!"? Reminded Sir Tamahome. "Just because you're one of the cute men in the original series that all the girls seem to swoon and fall head-over-heals for doesn't mean that you can't carry your own weight! I'm a bishounen too!!"  
  
Hotohori shook his head and turned to look ahead of himself again. "Please Tamahome... can you not think of yourself for a minute. We came on this trip in the first place to save Princess Nuriko. Don't you remember? The one that our evil friend Wizard Nakago kidnapped and now has her held captive in the Kingdom of Kutou. If anything Sir Tamahome... do this for her."  
  
Tamahome let out a sigh. "Don't you ever get old of doing the same old thing day after day? I mean, this whole 'Kidnap-The-Princess-And-Lock-Her- In-A-Tower-Until-Her-Prince-Comes-To-Save-Her gets old after awhile. I mean really, you would think you could give Nakago a little more credit than that."  
  
Lord Hotohori shrugged. "What can you expect? Things like this are a big hit with the girls these days." He smiled, flipping his hair back over his shoulder and winked to his friend.  
  
Tamahome smacked the palm of his hand into his forehead. "I really wish he would stop doing that... So... anyways, what do you think this Princess will be like?" Tamahome asked quickly to change the subject.  
  
Hotohori blinked, than thought for a moment before answering. "That's an easy one my dear friend. She would be just like me of course!" He paused for a moment than sweat-dropped. "Err... well, I mean she would most definitely have a chest... and um... you know... other things that aren't exactly like me..." He laughed nervously. "...However beauty-wise she could never compete to me. For we all know I'm the most beautiful bishounen to ever be created!" He glanced down at his extended fingers; slowly putting one down for each thing he had said. Eventually he ran out of fingers. "Well... alright. So maybe she wont be anything like me than..."  
  
Sir Tamahome hung his head and sweat-dropped. 


	2. Chapter 2

I profusely aplogize to everyone who has been waiting for an update to the story. To be completely honest I had completely forgotten all about this story (and the account for that matter) If it hadnt been for a wonderful person who favorited my story I probably wouldnt have ever remembered about it. *laughs nervously* Its only been about five years... my humble apologies. I promise an update will be made and the wonderful spoof of a story shall continue. My thanks to everyone whos read the small chapter. ^__^

The large castle loomed forebodingly a top the hill; lightening crashed at random around the castle lighting it up admidst the darkened sky, settling our stereotypical evil scene. The path to the castle was guarded by lackeys and minions alike, all under the command of their lord and master Nakago. Not to mention the winding narrow road no doubt laden with traps and ambushes and all sorts of other nasty surprises awaiting our heros that will no doubt have to travel this way to rescue our princess.

The guards were doing their patrol through the hallway, stepping carefully over a vase that lay shattering on the floor while trying to remain quite so as not to disturb the she-demon they were most unfortunate to come across.

"Honestly, why cant you behave like a NORMAL feeble girl and flail helplessly in my grasp!!" The angry voice shouted from behind the large double doors. The sudden voice made the guard on the other side jump and make a mad dash out of the way in case anything came flying at him. The sound of shattering glass from inside the room made him feel only a little more safe. "...and would you STOP breaking my castle!? Do you realize how much that cost??" The bellowing continued admisdt the chaos.

Princess Nuriko was (at one point) chained, bound and locked in the dungeon. Honestly she really just allowed them to put her that for fun and to play the part of the damsel, even though she wasnt planning on getting kidnapped or running into the stupid brainless wizard. It wasnt until they refused to bring her new clothes and a fluffy bed that she decided she didnt want to stay there anymore. Sure they tried to stop her but they could have just laid down and let her pass for the good it did.

"Oh you can afford to replace them you stingy old man! How dare you take advantage of a young innocent girl like me! There I was innocently riding along, minding my own business and you grab me and haul me off like a old mule! You have no idea how to treat girls at all! Do you know this!?" She lectured in her very much Nuriko-style, all the while fuming about the room, looking for the next most expensive item to take her frustrations out on. Wizard Nakago beat her to intended target before she could smash it- his prize bottle of Ever Shine hairspray.

"Innocent!? You were bloodly well invading my castle! You threw half my guards into the moat... BEFORE you scared the alligators away and AFTER broke the drawbridge into pieces no more fit to serve as firewood! And your saying I dont know my place? Your a demon, I've kidnapped plently of young princesses in my time and you for a fact are NOT a princess." Nakago glowered at her, huddling protectively on this belongings and trying to watch for the next item of her rage.

"Oooo.... Nakago.... your so mean!!" Nuriko flailed around, giving him a pouty look as if she were hurt by his words while accidently hitting the wall with her arm and all by destroying the entire wall in the process. A small sweatdrop formed on Nakagos head and he sighed, she was more trouble than she was worth.

"What exactly were you DOING in my castle anyways you destructive irritable creature?" He said through clenched teeth, knowing the more he yelled the angier she would become, he really hoped that she would be able to leave his castle in at least a half dozen pieces.


End file.
